Something tells me that this is going to make sense. Something tells me it’s going to take patience.

Something tells me that this will all work out in the end. I’m still waiting for You to be the one I’m waiting for.

do you ever get that gut feeling that someone will be good for you and you'll be happy together, but know that you will NEVER actually be together, but you keep holding on anyways??! it's like when i think of him, i have to gather my thoughts and take a breath. i mean i'm almost to the point where i wanna throw up everywhere i go because a thought of him pops up and i'm like c'mon really!!?? like seriously i was talking to my friend danielle the other night and i was honestly thinking that maybe somehow, someway life could all just be a dream. like if in reality i'm still four years old and i'm just dreaming everything up! i remember waking up one morning when i was four and no body being home. i started crying and i had my bear in one hand and my blanket in the other. and then i remember just falling back asleep thinking that if i just go to bed and dream i won't have to deal with reality and being alone. i mean who thinks that at four freakin years old! seriously. but now that i think about it...what if when i went back to sleep, that was the begining of my life, my dream. because somedays i'm just like 'wow this is honestly too good to be true so this has to be a dream!' and then somedays things are going nowhere fast and i almost wish it was a dream. life is trippy. sometimes when i'm driving around or enjoying a car ride with danny i look out my window at the world and the people in it. and i think dang. i will never go in that store or that hotel because i have no reason too, or i will never meet that person. and the next month i'm in that store buying chocoloate or in that hotel at a party or something. really though it's happened to me before, more then once, and i just laugh to myself. but meeting people i thought i would never meet is a different story. i've looked at a stranger and thought to myself i will never know what that person is like. all their subtleties. it's crazy how maybe a year from now or an hour from now i will meet them. because this world, or this dream, is just that. small. idk though. in a way it gives me hope. because if me and him are ment to be God will eventually make it happen. hmm /: i feel like my thoughts are scattered here and over there, in between and everywhere and i need to walk around and pick up the pieces. ha. so the question is..if i am dreaming...then how can i control it? and if i'm just freaking out and this really is my life then i need to figure out a way to be more lucid.