Twitchy Witchy Girl: July 2012

Labels: instagram, iphone, photos

1+1

I really can't help it anymore, we both opened up a can of worms. You started this cause and effect and now I'm falling like domino's, fast. You said all these things that I never in a million years would have ever expected. You said you didn't think I would ever reciprocate but I did and now you're all I think about. I really didn't know what I expected from it all happening and that hurts because I guess deep down I felt like something would bloom from it. I know you feel it, this really weird, strange chemistry, you said it yourself. I know you're with her, but are you really happy? No, because you said it. And when you were spilling your guts, all I wanted to do was hug you because I know what loneliness and losing sparks feels like. I'm not sorry I did it, because I wanted to. I wanted you. I still do. I am sorry that I complicated things, really, from the bottom of my heart. I'm just really fucked up, as a human being, really. I have Daddy issues and my Mother isn't that great of a role model when she's done the same damn thing. I can't blame them honestly, they've done their best. I will say it's fucked me up deep down and it takes a lot for me to admit sometimes. I do drugs, I'm an alcoholic, I'm mad, I'm sometimes manic, sometimes depressive, and I hardly ever eat. I know I'm seriously getting off topic, but I just feel like I can tell you anything, that's how you make me feel. I don't need to be saved, I just need you to let me know what you're thinking or feeling. That's really all I'm asking. Or maybe all I'm asking is that I feel you're kiss again, and your hands again. It was too emotional for me, probably the realest thing I've felt in years. I felt it, I felt you. I know you wanted it just as bad as I did. I just miss you already and it's only been 2 days..Please just let me know.

Labels: aaron c, diary

Labels: air buddie, award, instagram, pearlie

Listening to BSB and drinking some juice boxes, going to get weird tonight. :)

Labels: aaron c, diary, instagram, juice box, photos, twisted iced tea

sometimes i mourn for people i pass on the streets or in the grocery store, or at the bank because i know it'll be the first and last time we ever see each other and one day they'll be dead...

Labels: diary, mourn

i might've lost my faith..ask me if i give a rats ass...whatever that phrase means.

Labels: diary, faith

i wish we could go back to parcel posts..hand written shit and surprise packages. i hate texting and talking on the phone...

Labels: diary, mail, package, parcel post

i'm tired, i might just stop eating for a while, i'm super thirsty though. it's so nice out and i wanna do something. i miss you. i like you. i wish you were here. fuck off. i prefer being alone in dark places. i'm over summer already, the flowers are all so pretty though. i might go pick some. i actually can't wait for fall and halloween. i'm always waiting for the end of the year. purchased some new books, i'm obsessed. i can't stop thinking about drugs. might go make some tea or coffee, and might just let it sit there and get cold, might read a little, might sleep, might watch fight club, might not do anything, who cares.

Labels: diary, tired of being tired

Labels: 13 reasons why, books, emma roberts, instagram, lucy in the sky, new reads, photos, smoking

Had some English boys spend the night Saturday, one was from London and the other was from Sheffield. Let's just say it was an adventure. One asked why I had so many spooky things around my room, my response, because I'm kind of weird. Life has been pretty strange lately.

Labels: callum, diary, ekow, england, english boys, london, sheffield

Aftermath of the Hangover Queens.

Labels: hangover queens, lunch time, mint tea, photos

Welcome To The Fabulous Side.

Labels: cc's, danimal, fabulous side, photos, portland, sweet lou

After hearing the worst news ever, who's here to greet me at the end of the night..!!

Labels: chris fowler, instagram, pearlie, photos

Labels: brickhouse, dabney, photos

Labels: me, photos

Labels: dabney, iphone, party animal, text

Labels: 365 Art, art, david kiser, instagram, lil davy, my art, photos

i like people who follow their dreams no matter what. people who let nothing nor nobody stand in their way of making things happen for them. i like people who always do what they want when they wanted to do it. people who answer to no one and make no regrets. i like people who make life happen.

Labels: chasing dreams, diary

Anxiety kills.

I like you way more then i should. maybe i just wanna hold your hand, or kiss you, or maybe i just need to fuck you. either way, it's there and i know you probably see it, and know it, and don't really care for it, but i can't make it turn off. this thing that i have for you. i don't even know if i can call it a thing because we're not even an us. there is a only a me and a you and everyone else in the room. and i hate that when i sit next to you there is this wall, we can't see the wall, but yeah, it's there. and that wall makes it hard for me to move towards you, or talk to you, or even look at you. i mean, i look at people, i'm good at looking at people, right in their eyes, and this wall has made me a person who doesn't look at you. i don't even know anymore. it's so easy for me to flirt with people i don't like, i'm so god damn stubborn. maybe that's my problem, maybe i'm just a god damn slut who flirts with everybody else except you and i'm sending you these mixed signals or some shit. and i don't know if you're just shy or just not even interested or really don't care either way, but i just wish you'd make that move, or like, something. and i wish that my best friend never told you i liked you because then it would probably be a lot easier to move into this, i felt like our cars collided when she told you. or maybe that's it, you're just interested in my best friend. that's probably it. fuck. i need a drink. and i need to get my mind right.

Labels: diary, do you wanna take me on, faded, life's been a blur, you're my collision