Dear Chris,
It's been 3 days since you last kissed me. Do you remember the first time you kissed me? You said it was an innocent little peck and I turned it into something dramatic. As always. We were both buzzing real hard and you said I grasped you and said, "I want this to work." I barely remember, it was drunk talk escaping from my mouth. My heart keeps telling me that it was because I loved you then. I wanted to be with you forever. I was a wild child, I had a free spirit until you came in and swept me away, like a wave crashing on into my chest, so hard, knocking me flat on my face. You came unexpectedly, I never asked for you. I never wanted you. But you came anyways, you were always so hard headed. I keep replaying the way your face looked before you planted that kiss on me. It was, happy. I knew you loved me. I look at you now and I can't see the same boy I saw then. You're gone, all I want is my old Chris back. I don't want you to forget me. I don't know if it was the four years that changed you or if your relationship with her changed you, or even a combination of both. I can't see that happy boy I saw back then anymore, and that's probably what kills me the most. I want to save you like you saved me. I don't know if you're scared to love me again or if your love for me has faded with the years. I've changed, you've changed, everythings changed. Before three days ago I recall standing off the edge and your kiss pushed me over. I've fallin Chris and I can't pick myself back up anymore. I need you to grab my hand and just let me know what your intentions are. You kissed me, there is no running from that, but this is typical of you. To catch me and run away again. I mean give it up already. I don't know when the next time I'll see again, but please don't make it another four years. Just fall in love with me again. Be the Chris I need you to be for me.
Labels: diary, for the one i fell for
posted by Bianca Juarez at
9:00 PM
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