"Let's stay together till we're ghost. I wanna witness love, I've never seen it close. Yeah, but I guess I gotta find it first. That's why I'm really going off. Fireworks."

Baby Noah.

Babe.

Lovely.

-Drink more green tea
-Get back into soccer, softball, and ballet
-Paint more
-Write more
-Take daily photos of family and friends
-Go to a show
-Attend Saturday markets
-Find new music
-Ride my cruiser
-Spend more time with family
-Finish college
-Stop eating meat
-Eat more fruits and veggies
-Learn to cook and remember
-Travel to places I've never been
-Experience different cultures
-Make jewelry with leather a feathers
-Swim in more oceans, streams, rivers
-Read more books
-Self improve my mind, body, and soul
-Have a genuine conversation with someone new
-Embrace the positive, learn from negatives
-Be kind
-Let go of grudges
-Learn to play guitar and harmonica
-Quit smoking
-Leave random notes for random people
-Light candles and mellow out
-Make a bonfire and eat s'mores
-Drink more wine
-Create more art
-Become a mess
-Make a mess
-Clean up my messes
-Cut my hair
-Walk outside
-Step out of my element
-Walk barefoot
-Pick a flower
-Get a tattoo
-Stare at the stars
-Get scared
-Explore abandon places
-Get a job
-Get drunk
-Stay out all night
-Form bruises
-Get heartbroken
-Break hearts
-Find love
-Lose love
-Fuck love
-Go out and find love again
-Achieve all my dreams
-Stay classy
-Make bank
-Save money
-Blow all my money
-Make mistakes
-Sleep on the ground
-Plant a garden
-Go mad
-Fight like hell
-Recite poetry
-Create poetry
-Make monthly soundtracks
-Slow down
-Camp on the beach and watch the sunset
-Wake up to a sunrise
-Spend all day in a library
-Meditate
-Teach
-Learn something new
-Look around and feel
-Learn to ride a motorcycle
-Buy a rat and ferret
-Go back to church
-Pray
-Thank God

February 10, 2011

Sooo I'm deciding to go vegetarian once again. Well technically I'll eat fish because my dad fishes and brings home fish and I love sushi every now and then. But I will eventually work my way up to eating no meat+fish eventually. I'm really excited to start learning new recipes, especially since I'll have my very own kitchen soon. Soooo pumped. Definitely getting all the junk food feens out of my system before I move because when I'm well into my new home I'm going to go on a massive health kick. All my friends will hate me, they're gunna be like what the fuck, chill out amigo! he he! So fun, so fun. xx

Some men they go make their own luck; Others wait for that high sign.

I need to spend less time indoors and more time outdoors. Meeting new people, making my mark into the earth. The other day I thought about running away, but then my dad popped in my head and I can’t stand the thought of leaving him, disappointed and worried all the time; he has enough to worry about. I just wanna let go of everything that keeps me tied so far down. I wish I was more minimalistic, animalistic. I wish I could just feed off instincts. I wish my emotions didn’t have such an affect on me. Being human is the shittiest job ever. My mom told me yesterday, “If I was your age, I would go out into the world and explore. I’d go everywhere. I’d hitchhike if I had to.” She has me thinking. A lot about being tied down, I mean if I think about it I have nothing tying me down except my own fears and reasons to stay put. The older I get, the more I realize that I’m not one to stay put, I’m one to step foot. I think I’ve found my passion: Traveling and discovering possibilities. It’s hard to leave though. This pathetic town holds all my memories, a lifetime of crushes, and broken dreams. It holds my family, my friends. I have strings attached to everything here that has built me. I’m a puppet and it pains me.
My dream: To travel everywhere, take random pictures of random people I meet and random things I see. Write in a journal everyday about everything I see, taste, touch, feel, hear. Call my dad everyday and tell him Perla and I are still alive. I just wanna hear everyones stories, I wanna learn from the world, and I just wanna see where the good Lord takes me.

Health:
Drink plenty of water.
Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
Live with the 3 E’s - Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
Play more games.
Read more books than you did in 2010.
Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
Sleep for 7 hours.
Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:
Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
Don’t over do. Keep your limits.
Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
Dream more while you are awake.
Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
Smile and laugh more.
You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Society:
Call your family often.
Each day give something good to others.
Forgive everyone for everything.
Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
Try to make at least three people smile each day.
What other people think of you is none of your business.
Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
Do the right thing!
Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
The best is yet to come.
Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Songs I miss, along with the times that came along with them

Cold War Kids - Somethings Is Not Right With Me
Chairlift - Bruises
The Asteroids Galaxy Tour - Around The Bend
Cocoon - Owls
The Sleeping - You'll Be A Corpse Before Your Time
The Dead Weather - Treat Me Like Your Mother
Brand New - Jesus Christ
Bright Eyes - Lua
The Like - Narcissus In A Red Dress
Nick Jonas - Who I Am
Kris Allen - Live Like We're Dying
Andrew Bird - Fake Palindromes
Florence & The Machine - Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)
Les Plastiscines - Barcelona
Shakira - Did It Again
Teddybear's Stockholm - Yours To Keep
Just Jack - Disco Friends
Ace Enders - SOS
Neon Blonde - Headlines
Yeah Yeah Yeahs - Heads Will Roll
Bring Me The Horizon - Sleep With One Eye Open (Tek One)
Ryan Adams - Come Pick Me Up
My American Heart - Tired and Uninspired
Brandon Heath - Give Me Your Eyes
ADTR - The Downfall of Us All
Brandon Heath - I'm Not Who I Was
My American Heart - The Shake
Lady Gaga- Boys Boys Boys
BMTH - Diamonds Aren't Forever
Turbo Weekend - Something Or Nothing
Santigold - You'll Find A Way
The Veronicas - Take Me On The Floor
The Kooks - Seaside
Mat Kearney - Close To Love
Metric - Help! I'm Alive!
BMTH - Chelsea Smile
The Knife - Heartbeats
Metric - Grow Up
La Roux - In For The Kill (Skream's Let's Get Ravey Remix)
The Format - The First Single
MGMT - Time To Pretend
La Riots - Crystal Castles Remix
Rusko - Day N Night Remix
La Riots - Ting Tings Remix

My momma is moving to LA next week. I'm sooo excited for her!! && I can't wait to visit :D
Dad and I finally got approved for our house and I'm really impatient to move in already. We've waited so damn long I just wanna be in my home NOW! I wanna start decorating and renovating :) Perla finally gets her own back yard again! Eeeep! I think my plans as of right now are to find a job close to home, like in Camas or Washougal, maybe take a few classes at Clark and go from there. I can't wait for when my Grandma comes down to visit. It may take some time but in God's time, everything is gunna fall into place I just know it. I'm making a decision to live for me and not for what other people want me to do. I need to start tapping into my own desires and dreams..I need to let go of anchors. xx

Wintler Walks.

I'm just a girl trying to discover something beautiful.

Create something bewitching.

Become something lovely.

That's all.

I've been sooo fucking tired lately and I know I need to get some things done but I've been on a roller coaster of sorts. I wanna go back to school but I also want a job more then anything right now. I've had this big craving for money and lots of it. I don't care what anyone says but money really does buy happiness. And right now I'm jobless, broke, unhappy, unmotivated, and stuck.

Favorites.

Bloody Mary's. Lounge Chairs. Rock N Roll. Exploring. Baggy t-shirts. Flirting. Dreaming. Sunglasses. Blaring your music. Bafoons. Moccasins. Tan skin. Coyote hunting. Big open windows. Vacations. Chick flick marathons. Late nights. Freedom.

Home. Walking in the woods. Waling. Camping. Bonfires. Howling. Feathers in your hair. Music mixes. Writing notes. Picnics. Cartoons on Saturdays. Going to the lake. Popsicles. Dressing up. Red Lipsticks. Become a star. Kissing boys. Going barefoot. BIFFS. Acting Wild. Raging parties. Sugar highs. Making a mess. Night time adventures. Cemeteries.